Thursday, October 22, 2009

Beginning the ARFCOM papers

SEC files: the first “seeing eye cat” tale

Yesterday I was shoveling my truck out, and in the glove box, I found the temporary handicapped parking thingie the doc gave me when I busted my foot. That was a hands-down 'keeper', so I put it back in the glove box.

Last night the wife really started in on me about something dopey. I beat a hasty retreat to the basement; in fact it was so bad that the CAT beat me through the door. We sat there in the easy chair and watched TV (both put there for that purpose) and grew bored.

I decided to sneak out to a movie, but it wasn't fair to the little guy leaving him there. So I grabbed a 4' white 7/16 dowel and spray painted the end 10" or so red, grabbed my sunglasses, and put the cat in his harness and clipped on a leash. We sneaked out the back door and into the pickup. We drove off and I decided that it would be cool to see a movie if we could pull it off.

So when we got near the theatre, I put on my shades, pulled the handicapped thingy out and hung it on my mirror. I parked in a handicapped spot, grabbed the lease and the cane and kitty and I started toward the theatre with kitty playing the role of 'seeing eye' cat.

Some guy and his sweetie were getting out of their car, and she'd seen me get out of mine. I asked him, a real doofus, to lead me to the door. He took my arm and led the way. You should have seen her trying NOT to wet her pants. She was funny. She wasn't stupid.

I was poking things with my cane, got to the ticket counter and bought a ticket and stumbled around until an usher led me into the theatre and seated me. Kitty sat on my lap throughout the movie. (Ghost ship. Save your money.)

After the movie, the usher came running and helped kitty and I leave the theatre. Kitty on the leash led me to the truck, and I got in and we drove off. Kitty got an extra treat for his 'Academy Award' performance. NOBODY––-NOT ONE PERSON AT ALL––-CHALLENGED ME IN ANY WAY!!!! The people around us are stupid, lazy, or scared.

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